A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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