You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
