It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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