Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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