When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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