Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
