I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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