bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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