So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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