I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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