I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
