You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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