Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I bet he comes in French.
She announced her abortion via fbk
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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