she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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