Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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