I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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