why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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