And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
