You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
