i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
