I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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