yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
