You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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