my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I think my moral compass just broke
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