You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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