my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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