If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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