I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize