Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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