Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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