Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
