hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
