Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
