i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
