Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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