I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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