i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
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