I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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