Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize