I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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