living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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