we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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