Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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