I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
