Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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