How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went