Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
