I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
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