i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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