I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
