What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Shitshow foam night was such a success
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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